We’re looking at switching to Liferay (an open source enterprise portal solution thingy – I’m very technical) at work.
While browsing the forums in the community section of the company’s page, I noticed something... unexpected. The ranks they use for forum members are all based on the Star Wars ‘verse – youngling, padawan, Jedi knight, etc.
Though I am a former member of the Cult of Lucas , this does not fill me with a sense of calmness and well being.
Showing posts with label Star Wars. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Star Wars. Show all posts
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Monday, September 1, 2008
So much for my happy ending
“My ending was better.” I kicked at a pebble in the parking lot.
“Your ending?” one of James friends asked. There were five boys in total and I couldn’t keep their names straight.
“The ending I had planned out in my head before seeing the movie – the one I thought might have occurred to Lucas.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “Instead we got an overdramatic ending that messes with the continuity of the original trilogy.”
All six boys blinked and I wondered if I were talking an alien language.
“Continuity?” one ventured.
“Luke asks Leia is she remembers her mother – her real mother – when they’re in the Ewok village. He makes a point of stressing the word real, implying that Leia knew that her adoptive mother was not her real mother.”
“Maybe her adoptive mother died and her father remarried?”
“Or maybe Lucas can’t be bothered to line things up properly.” I shot James a dark look. Where did he find these guys and why couldn’t we have gone on our own. As usual, he was trying – and failing – not to laugh at me.
“So what was your ending?” one of the braver boys asked.
“Simple. Bail Organa turns out to have loved her for years and he sweeps her off to Alderaan. She never recovers and dies a few years later.”
“Which one was Bail Orgian?” this from the complete novice who had only started watching with The Phantom Menace.
“Jimmy Smits,” I replied, gently.
The others groaned. “No way. No way in hell.”
“No way what?”
“No way that guy could get Natalie Portman!”
It was my turn to blink. “It’s Jimmy Smits,” I said. They just looked at me – six pairs of blank eyes. “Jimmy Smits,” I repeated.
They shook their heads. They were adamant. In their minds there was no way a guy like Jimmy could land a girl like Natalie. “This is why none of you have girlfriends,” I muttered under my breath.
It was months before James let me near his friends again.
“Your ending?” one of James friends asked. There were five boys in total and I couldn’t keep their names straight.
“The ending I had planned out in my head before seeing the movie – the one I thought might have occurred to Lucas.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “Instead we got an overdramatic ending that messes with the continuity of the original trilogy.”
All six boys blinked and I wondered if I were talking an alien language.
“Continuity?” one ventured.
“Luke asks Leia is she remembers her mother – her real mother – when they’re in the Ewok village. He makes a point of stressing the word real, implying that Leia knew that her adoptive mother was not her real mother.”
“Maybe her adoptive mother died and her father remarried?”
“Or maybe Lucas can’t be bothered to line things up properly.” I shot James a dark look. Where did he find these guys and why couldn’t we have gone on our own. As usual, he was trying – and failing – not to laugh at me.
“So what was your ending?” one of the braver boys asked.
“Simple. Bail Organa turns out to have loved her for years and he sweeps her off to Alderaan. She never recovers and dies a few years later.”
“Which one was Bail Orgian?” this from the complete novice who had only started watching with The Phantom Menace.
“Jimmy Smits,” I replied, gently.
The others groaned. “No way. No way in hell.”
“No way what?”
“No way that guy could get Natalie Portman!”
It was my turn to blink. “It’s Jimmy Smits,” I said. They just looked at me – six pairs of blank eyes. “Jimmy Smits,” I repeated.
They shook their heads. They were adamant. In their minds there was no way a guy like Jimmy could land a girl like Natalie. “This is why none of you have girlfriends,” I muttered under my breath.
It was months before James let me near his friends again.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
A not-so-special edition
“I knew they had the time wrong,” I grumbled as we milled about in the theatre lobby, our boots wet with slush. “If the original is two hours, the special edition is obviously going to be too long to schedule showings for seven and nine pm.”
My cousin shrugged. “You were the one that had to go opening night.”
I grinned. “I was, wasn’t I?” I grabbed his arm. “This is going to be GREAT. You’ve never seen any of them in theatres and I’ve only ever seen Jedi on the big screen.” I bounced lightly on the balls of my feet.
James rolled his eyes. “Yes, it’s cool – very cool – please keep your voice down.”
They finally opened the theatre doors and we claimed our seats – middle of the theatre, middle of the row.
We sat in silence, eyes glued to the screen. My mouth may have been hanging open.
And then...
“What the fuck was that!?!” I clamped a hand over my mouth in horror – even though it’s the late show, there are kids in the audience. “What was that?” I repeated, in a whisper.
“Greedo shooting first,” James replied.
I nodded. “That’s what I thought.”
I slid down in my seat and crossed my arms over my chest. I didn’t speak for the rest of the movie. I didn’t speak, hours later, as we wormed our way up the aisle and through the lobby.
“So what did you think?” James eventually asked, trepidation on his face.
“That! He! That! What! Gah!”
James nodded as I sputtered. “Do you still want to see Empire?”
“No!” I practically spat out the word and he laughed.
I still haven’t seen the other two special editions.
My cousin shrugged. “You were the one that had to go opening night.”
I grinned. “I was, wasn’t I?” I grabbed his arm. “This is going to be GREAT. You’ve never seen any of them in theatres and I’ve only ever seen Jedi on the big screen.” I bounced lightly on the balls of my feet.
James rolled his eyes. “Yes, it’s cool – very cool – please keep your voice down.”
They finally opened the theatre doors and we claimed our seats – middle of the theatre, middle of the row.
We sat in silence, eyes glued to the screen. My mouth may have been hanging open.
And then...
“What the fuck was that!?!” I clamped a hand over my mouth in horror – even though it’s the late show, there are kids in the audience. “What was that?” I repeated, in a whisper.
“Greedo shooting first,” James replied.
I nodded. “That’s what I thought.”
I slid down in my seat and crossed my arms over my chest. I didn’t speak for the rest of the movie. I didn’t speak, hours later, as we wormed our way up the aisle and through the lobby.
“So what did you think?” James eventually asked, trepidation on his face.
“That! He! That! What! Gah!”
James nodded as I sputtered. “Do you still want to see Empire?”
“No!” I practically spat out the word and he laughed.
I still haven’t seen the other two special editions.
Monday, August 25, 2008
In my day, everyone knew he was the bad guy...
“I did something horrible the other night.”
I looked up from the brochure I was working on. Jasmine, usually so calm and composed, was fidgeting. “What did you do?”
“I let my son watch Revenge of the Sith.”
“Ah.” I nodded, knowingly. “How old is he?”
“Six.”
I whistled. “Ouch.” After seeing Sith in theatres, I had warned all of my friends with kids under the age of eleven to steer clear unless they could watch and evaluate first.
Jasmine shook her head. “It really upset him. He always wants to be Anakin when the kids play Jedi.”
“It’s not your fault,” I assured her. “You didn’t know.” Though you might have suspected after he slaughtered that village of sand people in the last movie, I silently added.
She said something else and I nodded, but my mind was already elsewhere. I was thinking that her story perfectly illustrated one of the biggest hurdles faced by the prequels. It wouldn’t have mattered if the stories were flawless (they weren’t) or if the films were executed perfectly (see note on stories), it would have been difficult for me to emotionally invest myself in Darth Vader – and we all know that’s what little Ani is going to become.
One film showing Anakin’s descent into darkness would have been interesting. Three films relying on me cheering for him as the anti-hero just didn’t sit right.
I looked up from the brochure I was working on. Jasmine, usually so calm and composed, was fidgeting. “What did you do?”
“I let my son watch Revenge of the Sith.”
“Ah.” I nodded, knowingly. “How old is he?”
“Six.”
I whistled. “Ouch.” After seeing Sith in theatres, I had warned all of my friends with kids under the age of eleven to steer clear unless they could watch and evaluate first.
Jasmine shook her head. “It really upset him. He always wants to be Anakin when the kids play Jedi.”
“It’s not your fault,” I assured her. “You didn’t know.” Though you might have suspected after he slaughtered that village of sand people in the last movie, I silently added.
She said something else and I nodded, but my mind was already elsewhere. I was thinking that her story perfectly illustrated one of the biggest hurdles faced by the prequels. It wouldn’t have mattered if the stories were flawless (they weren’t) or if the films were executed perfectly (see note on stories), it would have been difficult for me to emotionally invest myself in Darth Vader – and we all know that’s what little Ani is going to become.
One film showing Anakin’s descent into darkness would have been interesting. Three films relying on me cheering for him as the anti-hero just didn’t sit right.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
